A Hard Knock Life

Ironically, the same topic has emerged several times this week. I've philosiphized, debated and analyzed it to death. Yet, remaining jaded by society and experience, still haven't arrived at a conclusion. How exactly do women today define success? Or better yet, what will ultimately contribute to our happily ever after?

Back in the 1940's and 50's, a women's role was easily determined. For the most part, she was expected to be the ideal wife. The American Dream. The typical "let's play house" theme. Housewife, mother and domestically adept. Keeping everything neat and tidy for her hard-working husband. Okay, that would get a little boring. So I see why the American woman wanted to do a little bit more.

So she did. The 60's brought the feminist revolution. We want equality. We want power. We want independence. So after years of fighting, my generation of women has the opportunity to have it all. The question is, how bad do we really want it?

Like so many young women in their twenties and thirties, I was brought up relatively strict. Good grades, high school diploma, college degree, move up the career ladder. "Success" was the motivator. "Achieve high goals" and "make somebody of myself". These ideas were constantly getting drilled into my head. Not just by the parentals, but by society in general.

There's no longer as much focus on being that "ideal wife" as there is being an independent, career-driven, entrepeneur that can make a way for herself. I think I can safely say, we've now reached the other end of the spectrum. We are now the ones who are hard-working executives, wives, and mothers. We've taken on the male and the female roles of the past. And it's expected of us. If we don't achieve all three of the above, there is a sense of failure.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all about ambition and motivation. But I'm beginning to think that women these days are being pushed too far. Or maybe we push ourselves too far. At times I find myself focusing so much on the future of my career that I forget what I want most out of life. I can tell you that becoming a corporate icon with no family to speak of would get quite lonely after awhile.

At this point I think it's good to regress, just a little, to the old-fashioned views. We need to realize that it is okay to accept help and support from men and not feel guilty about it. It's time to stop trying trying to run the world and sit back and focus on what will give us the happily ever after that we've always longed for.

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Sidenote: This is in no way discounting men's roles during this day and age. Of course they continue to work hard, but so many [note I said "so many", not "all"] are not even concerned about supporting their wives/significant others. On the contrary, complacency exists when the woman supports (or can support) the man. Even worse, women are not expecting men to support them.

Guys, it's time to step up to the plate. Whether or not you have a working girl, it's time to take responsibility. What ever happened to good ol' chivalry and charm? Even though we've been brainwashed by society, we still want that knight in shining armor. And I'd like to believe that all the beautiful, deserving ladies out there will one day find Prince Charming.